>Saving Our Daughters: Can we?

>”I’d say about 16.  I lost my virginity and the whole sexual world sparked my interest.” “I think it was just wanting to explore sexuality,” she goes on. “I know it’s such a big world I was just like, wow, well since I like sex. . .I wanted to see everything that I would like, every kind of fantasy I would like and porn is a way that I could explore that.”  These shocking words quoted by E are the words of Montana Fishburne, the daughter of Lawrence Fishburne.
As I watched the video and read various reports, I was saddened for Montana, her dad, her family, and for all the other young ladies out there like her. Through all the media attention, Montana wants the world to believe that she’s happy, but I’m sorry, I don’t buy it!  I don’t hold a degree or certification in psychology, or anything remotely close to the subject, but I am a mother, and I see a young lady who is feeling a lot of pain. I can sit here and speculate all I want, the fact of the matter is that I don’t know and probably never will know what has driven her to this point, but I am certain that she’s hurting on the inside.
What’s going on with our girls? Is it a reflection of society? Is it a lack of morals?  Is it a lack of spiritual guidance? Oh man, it would be really easy to judge Montana on her career path right now, but I can’t. I am just going to pray for her and hope that others are doing the same. I feel pretty strongly that the break down in the family and community structure is contributing to the demise of our young ladies. Montana also spoke of Kim Kardashian, as if she was some kind of role model. I guess she’s hoping to achieve Kardashian’s level of notoriety, which I find quite repulsive. Unfortunately the sheer volume of reality TV continues to rise; and so many people are willing to exploit themselves for a few minutes of fame. 

Our little girls are growing up way too fast and we have to do our absolute best to find a balance between allowing them be innocent little girls and allowing them to mature and to grow to be independent young ladies. I say, we let them play with the dolls as long as they want, pull out the jacks and jump ropes, restrict what they see on TV, watch TV with them to explain what they’re seeing. Be very careful about those sleepovers, talk, talk, and talk, about everything under the sun. When my daughter was about ten, her best friend’s mom approached me. She was concerned because my daughter was talking to her daughter about the female reproductive system. Her daughter was uninformed, but quite curious. My daughter shared what she knew, which led to her questioning her mother about it. Her mother asked me to tell my daughter to stop talking about that stuff with her. I thought she was out of her mind, but responded nicely.

I know that every child is different, and what works for one, doesn’t necessarily work for the other. But we have to be diligent in our efforts to save our daughters, sometimes from themselves, and more often from the outside world. I know a lot of beautiful women who take time out of their day and volunteer to work with the young girls, some of which don’t have daughters of their own; they are simply caring, kind, and giving women. Kudos to each and every one of you!!! I’m not naïve and know just how difficult it is to talk to them. I live it every day at work and experience the fury on a daily basis; however if we keep the Montana’s of the world in mind and think of them as our own, perhaps we can make a difference in a life.

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